Yes, I DO Pray For Our Nation...

Have you ever felt that your world is about to end and therefore you want to do something which will forever be cherished in your memory before the lights finally go out? Perhaps in the last few weeks, it was how I felt, and therefore we made a rash decision for a day-trip to Brussels - while it was still relatively easy to pass through security and the two passport control kiosks at London St Pancras International before boarding the train.

But it was not to be. Instead, as already mentioned in my last blog, the Consultant at our regularly-attended hospital had already arranged for my beloved to receive her chemo intravenously on that same day. Therefore I had two valid return Eurostar tickets which were non-refundable. I would have been far happier to have given those tickets away to any interested couple if it wasn't for the rather small hindrance of having our names printed on them. After all, to make someone, or better still, two people, very grateful and happy would have helped atone for the loss, and therefore considered a privilege.

On the early hours of Wednesday morning, I laid on the bed next to my sleeping wife, in torment and unable to sleep. Where we should have been in bed at the Premier Inn St Pancras, instead, we were at home. I felt troubled by my own stupidity, my impulsiveness, going back to when my wife and I were sitting at St James Park fronting Buckingham Palace. It was here where the idea of a final trip abroad before the UK leaves the EU entered our minds. Alex was equally enthusiastic.

There was some justification for this decision. I was curious about what could happen at St Pancras International if we were to leave the European Union without a deal. On the worst possible scenario, the passport checks would be so much slower and more complicated than at present. After a no-deal Brexit, according to a couple of independent sources, very long queues could form, even snaking back to Warren Street Station! Of course, fully realising that if such would happen, Eurostar would quickly go out of business, and the threat of the French SNCF withdrawing permission for our trains to use their lines also stands as a very real possibility.

This and all other thoughts raced through my head as I lay there. Indeed, Project Fear would love to exaggerate any potential future disaster to unrealistic proportions in their attempts to thwart Brexit. But with us both heavily relying on medicine, the thought of its cross-Channel shipping suffering bureaucratic hindrance from mainland Europe does pose a very serious threat. Then not to mention empty superstore shelves due to panic-buying. Unfortunately, the optimistic view from the Daily Mail journalists, assuring us that all will be well after a no-deal Brexit, does not offer me a crumb of comfort. Instead, I feel the torment biting.

What is happening to our country? Could it be likened to a river approaching a deep waterfall? That is to say, is Brexit more of a judgement from God rather than a blessing, as the optimists believe?

This is one of many thoughts passing through my head as I lay there. Indeed, the Bible does predict that in the latter days, men "will run to and fro" and knowledge shall increase (Daniel 12:4). If I have gotten this interpretation right, then the whole world, and not just England, can be likened to a much wider river on its approach to a massive waterfall - the waterfall of universal tribulation. All life in the river doing its own thing, totally unaware of the catastrophe ahead. And so we drift with the current as we all make our own plans for an imagined golden future of national independence and sovereignty of patriotic fervour and optimism.

And as the waterfall gets nearer and nearer, the level of wickedness increases. But that not just the increase of bad deeds, even though the rise of the knife and gun crimes are making headlines every day. Rather, Britain is the birthplace of the greatest brain robbery ever to arise. This terrible deception had its origins here, in Britain, of perhaps I could refer to as the diabolical trinity of Uniformitarian Geology of Scotsman Charles Lyell, Organic Evolution of Lyell's English follower Charles Darwin, and Social Evolution and Eugenics of Darwin's English cousin Francis Galton. Such philosophies had not only brought about the Holocaust of Nazi Germany's national supremacy but remain active to this day in both in the medical world and in the subconscious of many an average Briton.

And as by these academic ethics continue to push away the truth of the Gospel until the very existence of God is ridiculed as ludicrous and a laughable joke by a very high percentage of the English population, any optimism attached to Brexit is eroded away to the point of believing it's a judgement of God for the nation's rejection of him rather than a deliverance from the chains of the EU.

And so I lay on the bed racked with despair. Grieving over the loss of our trip combined with our fate - a destiny which I have voted against.

And it was then I began to pray in an audible voice, even if it risked waking up my wife and keeping her awake. Indeed, the wonderful therapeutic benefit gotten through prayer cannot be exaggerated. Prayer has that power to free the soul.

As usual, I tend to open prayer with thanksgiving. This is when I count my blessings. This includes the breath of life passing through my nostrils, the ability to think, feel, understand, my health, the ability to love and everything of life. I thank God for my beloved and by God's grace, the ability to love and care for her during the darkest moments of our marriage where her health is concerned.

It was then when I remembered Abraham's plea for Sodom as recorded in Genesis 18:16-33. I really thank the Lord for having such a conversation recorded in Scripture. In it, there's so much to learn. And this includes the humility before God's holiness shown by the patriarch when he sees himself as dust and ashes. But through this Scripture comes my conviction that we as a nation exist with a reasonably healthy economy and a respectable level of prosperity because there are plenty of righteous people living in the land.

And so I cried out,
Lord, what about the righteous living with us? Will you pass judgement on the righteous as well as on the wicked? Will you pass judgement on us too, who are righteous before you?

Among other things, including our marriage relationship, I brought the same request over and over again. Then I pleaded with God that the hold of Evolution in our land will be loosened and souls saved. I even pleaded that we remain in the European Union, for we would be far better off remaining as a member than to leave. Then I conditioned the request with the words:
However, not my will, but your will, be done.
Thus, I left the decision to leave or remain in the EU entirely in God's hands.

In the end, I have prayed for a considerably long time, perhaps for a better part of an hour. Then when she realised that I have gone quiet, she turned and whispered that that was the best prayer she had ever heard. Encouraged, I dropped off to sleep, at last, around 4.30 am.

Although I felt much better when my friend Dave took us both to Frimley Park Hospital, where she had her chemo treatment, it still took a while before I was totally free of the torment. However, it's good to know that such prayer was able to move mountains.

Abraham's intercessory plea for Sodom is an eye-opener for why we as a nation keep on doing reasonably well despite its rejection of God's existence, its denial of Divine Creation and the reality of Noah's Flood. Simply this: Righteous people are living in the land. And if as little as ten righteous people living in Sodom was enough for the whole city to be spared for their sakes, how much more will the presence of churches will spare England also?

At this point, it's wise to ask: Who is a righteous person? Am I being presumptuous by calling myself righteous? Simply this: He is the man whom God imputes the righteousness of Jesus Christ into the sinner's account. Therefore, all his sins, past, present and future, are wiped out, and God sees this person in the same way he sees his only begotten Son, Jesus Christ. As Paul the apostle wrote:
However, to the one who does not work but trust God who justifies the ungodly, their faith is credited as righteousness. Romans 4:5.

Paul then goes on to write about Abraham and how he was credited with God's righteousness when he believed that children will come from his loins, including his seed, that is, Jesus Christ:
Abraham believed the Lord, and he credited to him as righteousness. Genesis 15:6.

Therefore, I'm absolutely convinced that there has never existed a person who was made righteous by his own deeds. Every single person who will enter heaven, from Adam, right through to the end of history, will be there because God has imputed his own righteousness into that man's account. There is no exception. As the Scripture says that no one is righteous, no one seeks after God, then imputed righteousness from God to the undeserving sinner has no other option.

This is dramatically demonstrated in Scripture when John the apostle sees a remarkable vision of a sealed scroll, and a challenge was thrown out to the entire heavenly population on who is worthy to undo the seals of the scroll. And it was found that not a single person throughout all of history was worthy to open the scroll! And at the vision, John burst into tears. That is until someone worthy to open the scroll was revealed to him, who is none less than God the Son, the crucified, buried and risen Jesus Christ (Revelation 5:1-5.)

That is an astonishing vision John had which endorses the eternal security of the believer. The true saint will once be saved always remain saved. And furthermore, any political opinion has no credit whatsoever. If the righteousness imputed into him is God's own righteousness, then this righteousness cannot be broken by political views, as God's own righteousness is eternal.

As such, I think about my good friends, including Dr Andrew Milnthorpe, who has voted to leave the EU. But I also have good friends who had voted to remain. Really, it doesn't matter. Righteousness comes through faith in Jesus and not by political opinion.

Therefore, it was perfectly right to intercede that night. But this wasn't the first time. I have prayed for our nation several times, maybe many times over the years. But if I did, then I can be thoroughly sure that it had to do with its sin of unbelief and its need for salvation, and not for any political direction.

Hope of Answered Prayer?

Any regular reader of this blogger page has most likely read last week's post. It was about making a hasty decision during a moment of mental and emotional weakness to mistakenly open a bank credit account. 

Just to recap:

After making an online purchase, the Bank contacted me over the phone that my account was targeted by a fraudster. Immediately I jumped on my trusty bicycle and pedalled into town. At the Bank, the fraud was verified as having occurred. Although the immediate problem was quickly resolved, I was emotionally wretched. And the advisor who fixed the problem then homed in on my vulnerability by launching a sales pitch of the wonders of having a credit account, with which I would be protected from any future fraudulent transactions. After quite a bit of computer keyboard tapping, a foolscap was printed out on which I signed at the bottom. It was soon afterwards I was handed the Terms and Conditions on a document thick enough to impress any civil servant.

But within the many wording, towards the back was a small paragraph informing me that I had an opt-out clause to close the account, which comes into force for two weeks after receiving the card, which itself took up to a week for it to arrive.

While I was walking along the High Street, I immediately began to regret what I have done - to offer myself as a slave to my new master, one who would have control over our joint bank account, willingly lending us money, followed by a demand to pay back with interest. In other words, to be in constant debt, something I have carefully avoided for nearly two decades.

I found myself praying in the street. I wasn't conscious of anyone looking on, neither did I care less if I had attracted anyone's attention. I made my way to Costas. There in the coffee bar, I sat alone at a small table, a large cappuccino in front of me, my face buried in both my palms, praying. Confessing to God of my error, my mistake in making such a rash decision. Praying for release from the burden. It was after arriving home and having read the Terms and Conditions, was when I discovered the opt-out clause. On the same day my card had arrived, I turned up at the Bank and cancelled the Agreement and closed the account. Oh, what relief! 

Again at Costas, I sat with another cappuccino. I was thanking God and praising Him this time. I looked out from the shopfront window. The world looked far more cheerful, like a spring in the step. Although the scene was as it always been, with passing pedestrians populating the traffic-free thoroughfare - singles, couples, families, groups, an occasional dog perhaps, yet there was this liberating feel about the environment. The sense of joy. The sense of freedom, like an ex-convict released from prison and heading home.

Today, the final letter had arrived from the Bank, confirming that my account is now closed and with instructions to destroy the card. Up to the present I have kept the card for use for any possible reference or correspondence. But now, what pleasure it was when I took a pair of scissors and cut the card up into four pieces! 

Exactly like I did nearly two decades ago. I cut up the old credit card then. But the reason for this was slightly different. My beloved was pregnant with our first daughter. I did not want her to grow up in a household ridden with debt. Such an environment would not be ideal for any of our children. Therefore my wife and I agreed that if we need anything, whether it's groceries, a household utensil or piece of furniture, or a holiday abroad, we will always make sure we had enough to pay for it before purchase.

I believe that my opinion on this matter is Biblical. For example, Proverbs 22:7 says,

The rich rule over the poor and the borrower is a slave of the lender.

Also Proverbs 22:26-27:

Be not one of those who give pledges, who put up security for debts. If you have nothing with which to pay, why should your bed be taken from under you?

And Romans 13:8:

Owe no one anything except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.

This is one of the benefits for a believer in Jesus Christ. It's impossible to live a perfect life, without making mistakes or bad decisions. But God is so willing to forgive and to make restoration for any error made. This reminds me of an old soap powder advert that used to be shown on TV. It featured a mother warmly welcoming her son back home with his shirt smeared with mud after some rough play outside. All smiles and not a single scolding, the soiled shirt was put into a washing machine and hey presto, it comes out not only clean but with incandescent whiteness. The boy puts it back on and then dashes back outside to resume his game with his mates.

Whether all mothers are as patient and so understanding as this one was, I cannot say. But at least back in those days, boys were boys. Rough play was part and parcel of growing up, to prepare them for the tough world as adults. It's a good likeness to Christian living. To take the knocks life throws at us. And indeed we can return to our Heavenly Father with mud on our shirts, our knees grazed, a bruise on our arm, and not only would he cleanse the shirt to the level of incandescence, but also heal our injuries too. I have wondered whether the old soap powder ad was a good illustration for the struggling Christian.

If only.

Some prayers are answered quickly, often with human cooperation, such as the rectifying of the credit account decision. Yet others seem to hit a brick wall. The case of my wife's health is a case in point. Prayer upon prayer has been offered for her healing and restoration. Not only from me but from my inlaws, along with members of our fellowship, including our Elders. We have been praying for years but have never seen her restored to her youthful health, the sprinting athlete who I met, married and had children. Instead, I have watched her health slowly deteriorate over the years, first with backache, then with spells of seizure, then immobilisation which confines her to a wheelchair while outdoors, and now with breast cancer too, which required a mastectomy and ongoing chemotherapy. Where is God in all this?

Yet an incident occurred this week while I was out with a friend and church elder. When I arrived home, I found my beloved in a seizure with her arm shaking involuntarily. Unable to wake her, I had no other option than to dial 999. She was rushed to Frimley Park Hospital where previously she had her mastectomy. At A&E, she was treated with Diazepam to calm her involuntary movement and also with antibiotics to eliminate any threat of infection which, due to her chemo treatment, could turn septic, therefore life-threatening. She was kept in overnight to be seen by the Oncology team on the next day. It was discovered that a hard plastic securing clip fixed onto her percutaneous catheter was irritating the skin surrounding where the tube enters her body through her affected arm. It was the continuous and rather intense pain which led to her seizure.

The hard-plastic clip was replaced with one made with a softer material. It made all the difference and she was allowed to go home. Yet the Consultant wasn't fully satisfied with her condition. He wanted us to return for a scan to ensure there is no blood clotting around her catheter. However, when the scan was carried out the day after, a clot was located, which means she has to take a dose of Dalteparin Sodium subcutaneously each day for the next three months. That means that during those weeks it's up to me to give my beloved her daily injection.

Although there are times when God is so far away when it comes to Alex's health, I can't help sensing that finding her in a seizure after arriving home was an act of God's presence and mercy. Because, if the clot was to dislodge and flow freely through her bloodstream and even enter her coronary artery, she could suffer from cardiac arrest. This, of course, is just a guess on my part, but one based on true stories I heard of very similar causes of death.

If all this is true, then God has always been with us during the whole experience dating back to 2012 (when her periodic backache started to escalate). The fact that God doesn't heal by the one command will always remain a mystery, even though Jesus told his disciples to heal the sick as part of the Great Commission, after his Resurrection. But this I have come to realise: God answers prayer if following his will and not necessarily ours.

Looking back over the last few years, I have come to realise that caring for my wife is indeed part of Christian growth, which involves character-building. The timing of all this coincides well with retirement from paid work as a self-employed window cleaner. The truth is - there is no such thing as Christian retirement. I'm here to serve the Lord until the day I'm called home. Learning to look after and taking care of my disabled wife has added a lot of good to my Christian experience, just as 35 years of cleaning windows had taught me quite a bit about interpersonal relationships with the customer, and the will of God in putting my clientele's welfare above my own. And that applied especially to the senior citizen, quite a few I had on my rounds.

Learning to be patient and gentle is part of God's will for me. And those two fruits of the Spirit were certainly no part of my raw character which blighted my youth. For example, when I started my window cleaning business in the late Summer of 1980, I was focussed on money and enterprise, to first survive, then to make a profit, to do well, rather than seek the best of the customer's welfare.

But God is benevolent in character and he is always willing to bless us. Therefore, whenever I was planning a holiday, especially a long-haul backpacking trip, I was always praying, especially against these potential obstacles:
Airline strike,
Illness,
Accident,
Unexpected expense,
A threat to personal safety.

Yet between 1973 (when I first travelled as a Christian believer) to this day, God has always answered my prayers before departure. Except on just one occasion. That was in 2013, after making a booking for our anniversary break in Crete, one of the Greek islands I hadn't been to, but keen to visit. Instead, Alex went down with complete immobilisation, and our GP had her referred to Royal Berkshire Hospital, where she stayed as an inpatient for four whole months between August and November. This covered our 14th anniversary, where I spent our special day sitting beside her hospital bed.

A devastating loss at the time, yet God used that experience to show me that my love and commitment to my beloved wife comes way before any holiday pleasure. It has helped me to learn that travel is by no means be-all and end-all. Rather, our marriage has that claim.

With a wheelchair purchased in January of 2014, I knew that life from then on will be totally different from what I'm used to. Yet concerning travel, God has a way to still bless us, providing we appreciate what he gives us and receive it with thankfulness. This includes two Eurostar trips to Paris, one trip to Brussels, which was also on the Eurostar, a trip north to the Lake District, also to North Wales, and a couple of trips to Bournemouth and Swanage. I can be very grateful indeed that she hadn't suffered any pain or seizures while we were in France or Belgium, but suffered one whilst on the train returning home from Llundudno Junction last year.

God answers prayer. But not always how we would wish. He blessed us with travel experiences. He delivered me from a bad decision made. But he never heard my cry for Alex's restoration to full health. That was because he uses such experiences to fulfil his will in our lives.